Festivities in Autism

I need a reason for self-care. Without a reason, pleasurable self-care takes the place of forced hygienic labor. In short, necessity.

I need to be in the right place to celebrate or else.

Today I declined an hairdresser appointment.
I do things for a purpose only. 
Besides, I look good long haired, it s more about renewal, hence better after the  ‘commercial festivities’.

These are the most difficult days for me.
I just want to be with my wife.

Ironically, we booked the hairdresser together.
She wouldn’t cancel despite my pleas resulting in a two hours waiting for her to come home.

I feel guilty and scared.
Tomorrow is her birthday.
I bought her a present, can’t wait for tomorrow.

But today is dreadful.
I hope she’ll relax to the hairdresser who’s also her friend.
Maybe I did the right thing not to go.

Coming to my senses. We’ll go together next month and relax.

One thing at a time: tomorrow we’ll go dining out.
With neat long hair.

Matching boundaries.