Unhealthy Attitudes

Attachments imply several behavioral changes. They can become harmful to the sufferer and their next of kin. They are typically included in OCD-Obsessive Compulsive Disorder.

An attachment turns malignant when obsessive.
Repetition quickly destroys self-awareness, the stairway to Addiction.
When we are addicted, we can’t refrain from repeating the same destructive behavior over and over again.

What differentiates destructive behavior from rewarding behavior?
Examples are the most eloquent: reciting the Rosary is a rewarding Prayer. Drinking a bottle of whiskey a day is a destructive process.

Recreational substances release massive amounts of dulling chemicals.
These substances are not reuptaken by brain cells and require a new booster to kill emotional and physical pain.

Finally, the ‘Forget-Effect’ secures all addictions in the long-run, characterized by Self-denial and Euphoria.
Long-time addicts cannot recall the painful Withdrawal Syndrome, but the induced Euphoria only, as far as under the influence.

New rehabilitation works in making subjects on withdrawal meet with subjects on euphoria. Addicts have strong camaraderie in favour.
A lengthy evidence-based approach, though promising．

The Neurotypical must start by looking at Addiction as a Illness, not a Crime.
Remember: Addiction is not selective.

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Movies and Books in Autism

Autistics have specific fixations and dread new scenarios. The pathology is a potential way to addiction.

Autistics outlive movies and books very personally.
Speculation is they lose track of reality.

It’s very important to select the appropriate entertainment in autism.
I myself am haunted by visual and written material which I came up with in my adolescence.

Neurotypicals would talk of ‘self-identifying’, although it can go far beyond for autistics, to the extent of ‘addictive trauma’.

Addictive trauma has many implications and is very complex.
As you see, there are two conditions combined, Addiction and Trauma.

It is well documented the connection between PTSD and Addiction.
The abused tends to become the abuser in adult life.
Stress is the traumatic component.

How does this manifest in autism?
Disassociation, paranoia, depression, fiction-outlive, time-paralysis, obsession, loss of self-control.

I’m more oriented to the future, a delusion to a lesser extent still, we can ‘envision’ the future, not see it.

The neurotypical will ‘plan’ the future. 
The delusional will see it.





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Goal-setting and Motivation

Burnout Recovery

Back to Burnout, there are no alternatives: I mentioned Nervous Breakdown-former Burnout-to a teenager who was literally lost in translation.
My guess is the Seniors forgot old terminology as result of short-term memory onset, while the Elderly never memorized new vocabulary all at once.
Luckily, it is very unlikely for a 90 yo to experience Burnout from watching young ladies in the park.

I said in my previous post that the main symptom of Burnout is not accepting our limitations, henceforth shutting down all efforts to accomplish.
It’s either top or bottom, no in-between.

The Workplace can push us over the edge: that’s when Honesty and Integrity come to rescue when we strive for the best.
Shutting down is self-defeating.

Setting our goals is the most effective antidote to Burnout.
Goals are normally aligned with personal gifts.

There are several types of Burnout, although we are always accountable.
I had my trial with Burnout. 
My ADHD diagnosis saved me from progressing to MDD.
When we strive, there is no space for Envy, therefore Overwork and Burnout.

Now, after all the reprimanding, I am aware that we’re living in an Image Society where Titles count more than performance: don’t stand the chance, better a good Radiologist or Nurse than a Doctor without confidence.

In my experience, Patience, Perseverance, Motivation, Goals, Medication, were my recovery strategies from Burnout, supported by Professionals.

The above is intended to sharing, since I am still learning from mistakes.
Happy to learn from you too.
You count.


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Emotional exhaustion

There is not yet a diagnosis for Burnout, although the syndrome is fully understood. As of today, Mental Health professionals have no options but to include Burnout in MDD.

Burnout is a word invented by Dr. Internet, recently, former Nervous Breakdown. Another example of how Social Media are messing up in Medical.
Languages are no-longer mandatory, Grammar is now referred to as Keywords. Search Engines rely on the trendiest expressions created by Influencers-no qualifications required- in their Search Rating.
No one is typing Nervous Breakdown anymore. 
Burnout has become a popular definition of Exhaustion between teenagers.
MDD and Burnout have a different genesis, though nearly same symptoms.
MDD is involuntary, characterized by Serotonin-deficiency, Hopelessness and Despair. 
Burnout is always self-inflicted upon Sleep-deprivation, Competition, unrealistic Expectations, Envy, pushing us over our Limits.
Limits are not derogatory, i.e. we can be a better paramedic than a physician. 
In fact, Limits are personal Gifts. We have given Limits the synonym to Inferiority.
Experienced nurses know more than junior doctors…
Higher salaries are the main reason for Envy. Unfortunately, our society is Title-oriented, rather than Skill-rewarding.
Think for a moment: what is more important, Money or Wellbeing?

When we push ourselves over our limits, we burn out.
In other words, we don’t accept us．

Social Media only portray successful entrepreneurs.
Do you know that farmers and seafarers are at the forefront of sustainability?
Nobody is unworthy, only the lazy are.

To conclude, Depression is the result of long-term Chronic Stress, treatable pharmacologically.

Burnout is the Loss of Motivation for feeling used, kind of Impostor Syndrome. The sufferer is oftentimes overly proud, narcissistic, self-centered, delusional.
There’s no specific pharmacological treatment. Rest and Counseling work in raising awareness in the individual.
Failure to co-operate leads to MDD.
Self-acceptance is the best cure.
We are all uniquely gifted.




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Latest Technology

Staying up with society is the main trigger of Projection. The Present is virtually invisible in this day and age.

The Present is the only Reality, ironically the most difficult to live in.
In our digital world, the Present travels relentlessly.
We buy the latest model of smartphone when the updated version is already in the making… and if we are comfortable with an old device, we are deemed lazy and antisocial.

Technology is enslaving us.
Even so-called ‘geeks’, are having a hard time keeping up with technology.
The ‘Now’ is the new ‘Tomorrow’. 

Language is the key sign of the time.
Customary questions the likes of “What are you doing”, are put in a “What are you going to do” context.

The trend is all the more pronounced in traditional technological societies like Asia, where I live: the ‘Conversation starter’ is always “What will you do here?!”, rather than “What do you do here?” 
Routinely unnerving to me, prompting to snap sarcastically as  “I’ll eat dinner, tomorrow this time…”, to the horror of my Asian wife, shooting me at eye-point. Masking is definitely not my thing, proudly so.

We can’t afford to let go of the guard.
Obviously, someone is benefiting from all this, media giants to start with.

The pressure is almost unbearable, although I refuse to conform.

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Unpleasant Events

Aftermath is a popular synonym of PTSD.

When we endure a traumatic event, we strive to combat.
The aftermath is associated with defeat and PTSD. We never recover from grief, we learn how to live with it.
Mid-life is marked by loss and responsibility.

Whether happy or sad, anniversaries are a thing of the past.

I don’t understand the logic behind anniversaries.
Birthdays are the most eloquent: what’s the point of celebrating the fact that you’re one year older?
I condone the coming of age as reminder of adulthood.
From then on, it is all a downhill.

We must keep track of age for beaurocracy.
I do look forward to my retirement.

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Internet addiction

Technology has gotten out of control. Based on medical data, social media are adding to our anxiety. 

The Internet started with a noble attitude, just to get out of hand. ‘Internet addiction’ has become a diagnosis. I’m assailed by a destructive sense of nostalgia. Life as my generation knew it, doesn’t exist anymore.

Recent studies on teenagers showcase mood-improvements after just two weeks off media.
Governments are imposing strict rules to media giants.

For my generation, only the Past counts: Religion teaches that the Past doesn’t exist anymore, the medical profession sees it in a traumatic context.

Only the future is real these days, the biggest lie.
The future is most unpredictable: ‘predicting’ is never 100% accurate.
Who could predict the Covid pandemic?

There is no Future for me.
I only live in a traumatic Past and a slip-away Present.

Fear of age gripped me since I moved abroad. I never obsessed over age in my country, whilst it has become a painful countdown here.

Before the Internet age, we could spend Summer holidays sleeping on the beach without thinking of tomorrow.
We could stop time.

Nowadays, we want to escape the Momentum, because nothing is still.
We constantly project.

We didn’t have cell-phones in the 80s.
We could only watch the sea and the stars on the beach.
We felt united, free, safe. How many longtime, sincere, passionate love stories enfolded. The sentiment of Belonging as one body was dopamine flowing.
Sure, there was night and day, but the sea and the stars were always there.
Sunrises were soothing reminders of a new worry-free day.

Today, we watch at the phone on the beach.

Texts flashing no stop, leading us mercilessly into the day ahead, all the while scared to turn the phone off.

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Promising-perspectives vs Dream-perspectives in ASD/ADHD

Following up the implications of mid-life in youth society.

Promises and Dreams are very interchangeable.
I endorse to turn dreams into self-promises.

The dreaming effect is only temporary.
Dreams have limitations, I don’t like gambling.
I favour self-promises, certainties, loyalty.

A self-promise is a desire.
Desires are real.
Dreams are momentary illusions.
I promised to myself and God to go home in His time.

Where is it written in the Bible that one must be established by 40?
That’s the neurotypical thinking, good for them.

Why not dying at 40 if we accomplish everything by then?
What’s the point of living to 90-100 as wrecks?
Yes, you heard me right, Wrecks.
That’s what over 40s are for the workforce.

Let’s not say that we extended life.
Over 40s are virtually dead.
Better the Middle Ages, when 40 was the average lifespan.
People didn’t get old and age was seen as wisdom.

I was very disappointed with the radio comments of a pastor about age, saying that we must get old at 50 and prepare for death.

We must always be prepared for death, but not strive to get old.
We must strive to keep young and fit at any age.
Even in the Bible there are references to fitness:
“Stay awake, cause you don’t know the time and hour He is coming!
And wash your face often when you look tired!”

I always feel emotionally young, as result of having been deprived of my biological youth.
I want to outlive my youth now.
Your personality defines age, not your wrinkles, and they will be my most beautiful years.

“Ageing is an extraordinary process where you become what you should always have been.”/ David Bowie 

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80 s Fame Music Stars

Neurodiversity is evidently a ‘requirement’ in the show-business… whether real or staged, what role does Entertainment play in mental health?

I was deeply disturbed by the deaths of Tina Turner and Sinead O’ Connor. Most of the 80 s celebrities have died in the last decade.
Needless to say, they were human encyclopedias of mental illness.

I don’t worship celebrities, I honour the ones who played a role in my life, i.e. David Bowie, Madonna, Michael Jackson…

What role celebrities play?
Entertainment for sure, but not only.

Each celebrity, or ‘icon’ in the music industry, is associated with a particular audience.

The 80s saw the emergence of the Gothic movement.
David Bowie was the pioneer and the inspiration of all 80s musicians.
Peoples who grew up in those days, were inevitably influenced.
Song-lyrics were romantic, sad, reflective.
Dressing in black and purple was trendy between the young.
My generation still lives in that dimension.

Movements are a form of protection.
Gothic clubs for the middle-aged thrive as of today in America.
In Europe, they disappeared.

History repeating itself: everything borne in the Old Continent and move to the New World.

Tina Turner was the exception: she was born in America and moved to Europe in mid-life.
She downplayed her role.

R.I.P.




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States of mind

Managing time is awkward with ADHD/ASD yet inevitable.

Finding the right balance is essential in relationships. Combining time with reward is very powerful in brain neurotransmission.

Time is a State of mind to me.

Man created Time.
God is timeless.
To say that my mind determines Time, I m not a 9 to 5 person.

My definition of Time is Motivation.
Without motivation I can’t do anything.
ADHD Medication becomes indispensable to pave the way to deadlines.

However, I understand that Time is a form of respect too and I try hard to compromise with my partner.

I’ll give an example: I want to post my blogs to date. 
She wants me to post on her platform of choice in her Time, e.g. “tomorrow is better”…. What’s the difference between today and tomorrow once the editing is done???

That’s a major loss of Motivation/Time to me.

Today is one of those days.

But I’m pretty good at compromising by going into ‘compensation mode’: “Ok, I’ll keep Bowie playing all day!” 

And we both end up happy.

So, could Time be a form of Compromising?






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