Loneliness is either mystical or traumatic.

I dread loneliness, it paralyzes me.
I can’t live without my wife.
I have abandonment issues.

Is Abandonment a trauma?
It certainly is for me.
Others are comfortable with loneliness, they experience a sense of freedom and introspection.
As you can discern, it s a multifaceted subject.

We all desire ‘some time alone’, it’s detoxing and beneficial.
Isolation is always imposed and psychotic, despite seen as mysticism by some.
Mysticism and Hermitage are very distinct: the hermit withdraws from society, the mystic chooses to live in a remote place in order to avoid materialism by offering stays to pilgrims in search of inner peace.
Mysticism is not isolation.

Abandonment is always of traumatic nature, not a choice.
It’s the cruelest possible perpetration, especially towards the mentally disable.
The Neurodivergent need someone to rely on.
Never abandon.


Could ASD be a ‘Claim of Convenience’?

Is Wealth beneficial to neurodivergents? I believe it is background related. It definitely is for those raised in rich families, since the family becomes Comfort Zone. On the contrary, Wealth can build up anxiety in those coming from lower classes. Coincidentally, big financial tycoons happen to be on the autistic spectrum. 

Why can’t we all be wealthy?  
According to world s billionaires, everybody can.
We just need the desire.
Do you agree? I don t.      

The majority of billionaires come from rich families and carry on the legacy.

My emphasis is on how wealth impacts the life of neurodivergents.

The first step in becoming wealthy is Investing.

Investing is a challenge, not a forte in autism, yet inevitable for setting up any business.

Nonetheless, the quest for wealth can lead to mania and inadequacy.

I would do a lot of charity should I be a billionaire. Essentials only, account to me however, essentials are very personal.  
A car is probably the first essential for most people. A house on the coast, well served by public transport, is my priority.

Is wealth indispensable?

The founder of Domino’s Pizza, a multimillionaire and devout practicing Christian, said of wanting to die broke and leave his entire personal fortune to the poor. His heirs will inherit the Domino empire.

     

We subconsciously put undue pressure on each-other in the form of money.

Providence is usually associated with religion, typically referred to as Divine Providence.
Christians dwell in the belief that God has a plan for each one of us.
There is no failure for God.

Why fear then?

Suffering and Poverty are shunned by society, they are not of human nature. God knows it, He became human!
He shouted “Father, why have you forsaken me!” on the Cross.
He endured Suffering.
He never punishes, we punish ourselves.

My greatest joy is watching the sunset on the beach and helping the needy.
God will provide essentials.

I want to live and work in contact with the nature.
I lived all my life in big metropolises to no avail.
Time to go back to the roots.

I have a little house at the sea in an idyllic village.
I can stare at the sea from the window.
That is God’s providence to me.

Poverty is always been heavily stigmatized. The poor is often overlooked as the perpetrator of their own demise. Jesus was poor His whole life and taught us to see God in the poor.

Everybody struggles with finances at some point in life.
Financial stress is not necessarily associated with poverty but instability.

Nonetheless, the wealthy are most vulnerable.
A wrong investment can plunge into capital loss, to mention the most common scenario.

The poor, despite struggling, have little to lose and lots to gain, eventually.
Ironically, they turn out less mentally stressed than the rich.

That said, another less known subculture of poverty exists, the indebted.
This group is almost invisible, hard-working, sound looking.

I identify in this group .
It is the most frustrating dimension.
I desperately want to repair for this involuntary slip-away.

I can’t say I m poor. 
I work to pay my debts.

Life must go on.

I can’t foresee my future until debt-free however, I can see God’s providence.


Hope and Motivation go hand in hand. Same goes for Hopelessness and Depression.

Today I have no motivation.
I’m even wondering why I m writing.
I’m forcing myself to, though I m proud of my determination.

I’m alone and it s raining.
I’m in a hopeless phase.

Luckily, I know it s temporary.

We can’t modify dead ends. 
The term alone is daunting, we have no control over them, although there s a plan and a purpose for everyone.

I dread being alone.

I was shocked by the deaths of Lisa Marie Presley and Sinead O’ Connor, both in their early 50s.
Their deadline was Conversion, they didn’t make it.

My deadline is going home.

There has got to be a reason for each circumstance we find ourselves in. 

What good solitude brings?
I can’t see any.
Man was not made to be alone still, many people are.
I don’t want to be one of them.

People are lonely in this country: their workplace becomes their family.

A patriarchal society: husband coming home at midnight after eating dinner and drinking with colleagues and wife looking after children at home.
Family has a different connotation from my country.

I don’t belong here.

My mission as an expat, is to evangelize through the four apostolic principles:

Listen 
Befriend
Proclaim
Invite 

God got me.

If we don’t pursue freedom, we seek shelter.
I pursue freedom over shelter.

We’re all unique.

One is never really free as a guest, you conform to your host.
Going back to the roots is facing reality with a stronger mindset.

Enough escapism for me.

Trust. Just trust.





The place where you live can define your personality.

Talking about the importance of an harmonious environment for autistics. We all need harmony however, stress management is easier for neurotypicals.

A stress-free life doesn’t exist, we must learn how to survive in the middle of the storms that soon or later, life throws at everyone.

As for me, the sea combined with faith, have a calming effect. I always try to create a peaceful place for myself in my heart.

These are also International Relationships.
Consider carefully before committing.


Boundaries come with Harmony, another name for Peace. Sharing responsibilities is the formula for a successful marriage.

Disorganization is very upsetting to me, equal to not recognizing one s limitations.

I need my space in marriage.
That leads to arguments with my wife.

Autistics necessitate a peaceful space to live in.
There is no harmony where we live now.

Without harmony, there is no peace.


♬Maybe I was born right out of my time♬
David Bowie

Appointments drain me.

We usually associate appointments with health professionals.
In the post-Covid era would look like everything is by appointment.
In this country, you must book major retailers, Churches, virtually every venue requiring rehearsal.

Last night I’ve been dining out for the first time in 4 years, just to find a table-keyboard to place the order and a robot to deliver plates.
No human interaction. It was depressing. I even lost taste for the otherwise good quality food, complicit my psych s appointment.
Heaven’s sake, he looked better than the ugly serving machine!

I don’t think I’ll ever adapt to this new lifestyle.
I’m scared.
One more reason to undergo ECT and borne a child again.
Cosmetology will take care of extra wrinkles.

Our society judges us by age.

We are expected to be settled by 40. That is extremely unreasonable, since there is an increasing number of people getting married at 40/50, these days, willing to start a second life. We’re still living in post-WWII Baby-boomers culture of Elton John and Mick Jagger, great artists nevertheless.

I feel trapped and hopeless.

What’s the point of living past 40?
Our society is built upon the youth, unfairly so, since everybody ages.

We are all to blame, we don’t think about aging in our twenties.

Youth is short-lived and unrealistic.
Old age is real and permanent until death, even more so in this day and age where 90 seems to be the norm.
If we define 40 as the beginning of old age, it accounts for an additional fifty years, the longest time-frame compared to a mere thirty years of youth, yet we don’t invest in a productive Senior age.

Nonetheless, Young is not necessarily synonym of happiness…my twenties were my darkest days.

I want to live my twenties now.

David Bowie quoted: “Aging is an extraordinary process where you become what you should always have been.”

Digital society only benefits the Elites while stealing our identities. Do your part if you don’t want to become a tool for world control.

I talked about old age in my previous article saying that one is considered old at 40 in today’s media society.

Everything travels online these days and we’re spied 24/7 through all kinds of transactions.

It is humiliating for middle-agers.

Our only guilt is being born without smartphones and social-media despite having adopted them not without difficulties.

Our ‘chats’ were parks, pubs, clubs.
We grew up in a physical society where relationships were REAL and TRUSTWORTHY.

Still, the so-called ‘Millenium Children’ see us as primitives.
They forget that the greatest bands still active today were born in the 70/80s.

This reflects in the workplace too.

Getting a job for middle-agers is all about “Excellent knowledge of computers and latest technology”. 

Communication skills, teamwork, etc., have nearly disappeared from CV’s vocabulary.

This is particularly sad for expatriates like me looking forward to a second life back home.